D'Arricka

"Something is not right!" exclaimed Ms.Clavel! Ms.Clavel is the teacher from the popular children’s book and program, Madeline. Madeline has always been one of my favorite characters, even so that I named my car Pepito, after her mischievous neighbor. I used to always wonder how Ms.Clavel knew that something was not right in her school. Now that I am older, I know that Ms.Clavel used her intuition, a skill that most teachers possess. We know that little Tommy is up to no good, while we’re writing on the Smart Board or that Angelica really doesn’t have to use the restroom for the trillionth time in a row! Teacher intuition is a funny thing; sometimes you just have that feeling that something is not right.

 It has been a rough school year, closer to terrible if you ask me. My teacher intuition has been kicked into over drive! There is one event that I have dodged writing about because in all honesty it hurts to think about what has happened too much. When I started this blog, I wanted to share my teaching escapades in a rawness that others could understand. I will continue to do that and I am finally ready to let the words flow about D’Arricka.

D’Arricka was my student and she tragically passed away on April 29^th, of this year. She was a spunky little girl and always moved to her own beat. She loved to dance and she loved to read. Her favorite movie was Frozen and she absolutely loved the song, “Let It Go.” She was so full of life, the way that a kid should be. She was special and that’s the piece of her, which I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

I have had a hard time getting through her passing. That first night was the hardest; I couldn’t sleep because I saw her face every time I closed my eyes. I just couldn’t believe that something so tragic could happen to my kid. I remember trying to cheer myself up by going to shop at Target because I freaking love me some Target! I stood in the toy aisle staring at the Frozen dolls and cried my heart out. It’s been rough trying to cope with losing one of my kids and I pray to God, I never have to go through it again.

 I’ve asked why, so many times but in the end, I’ve come to understand that God has a plan. D’Arricka accomplished what God wanted her to and he called her back home. The pain is still there but so is my faith in God’s plan.  I will miss her and I am forever grateful that I was chosen to be her first teacher.

On the last day of school, Maupin was able to have a special memorial for her. I was able to create a slideshow to display at the program and the school planted a pink Dagwood tree in her honor.  I am so proud of my class and how they recognized the seriousness of the event. It was a nice ceremony and way to remember such a sweet little lady.

D’Arricka I hope you know that Ms. Smith loved you and misses you dearly! I am turning my tears into smiles because I know that you wouldn’t want me to be sad. I have your writing entry about me framed and on my wall. I will never forget you, sweet girl. Save me a good book in Heaven!

Special thank yous to everyone that has checked on me or offered me comfort in any way. My Maupin, family you ROCK for helping me get through those tough teaching days and the memorial ceremony.

Until the next time that life has checked me.

-Tia